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#ABUSENONELOVEASONE
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Why must it go on? Why is it happening to me? When will it end? https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x_qO0YGcRW0&feature=youtu.be |
Grade 10 Faith
Grade 10 Faith is a class that is very playful and friendly, much like a child. Since they are technically children themselves, they connect very strongly with this topic. The subheaders are the students of Grade 10 Faith and their insights on this very unfortunate social problem: child abuse.
Jennilyn Ching
Child abuse is one of the biggest issues affecting young people. We must really fight for what us right, because this is not something to be made fun of.
Alec Co
Child abuse is a "disease" that spreads through adults to children. This is a thing that can be seen as hereditary, as hurt people tend to also hurt more people, and the cycle will continue.
Charlize Dee
For me, child abuse is something really grave because you are hurting the future generation. We are supposed to nurture them to have a good childhood and to give them a stepping stone for the future.
Child abuse is also immoral and violates human rights.
Neil Galupe
Child abuse can lead to so many things, like mental problems or emotional neglect, which can lead to so many harsh and harmful thoughts and actions to one's mind. This can also lead to the abuse of others because of your own experiences.
Christian Gamboa
My insight is that child abuse will scar the kids for life. It will scar them that at some point, they might to it to the person they care for the most in the future.
Yasmeen Gaw
Even if a kid does something wrong, child abuse should never be an option. No one deserves to be abused, children included.
Garvin Gonzales
My view on child abuse is that it gives children low self-esteem, which eventually leads to no interest in playing games, studying, etc.. Not only will children have lack of interest, they will also have some difficulty in expressing their thoughts and emotions.
Hagen Hawson
Child abuse is one of the most common, yet one of the most terrifying thing that can happen to a child. Child abuse is a very bad thing because this can affect how the child grows up.
Fayme Hipolito
Personally, I am very against child abuse. In my opinion, couples should always make sure they want a child first before having them. If they do this, reasons for child abuse and its effects (e.g. depression and anxiety) will significantly lessen.
Charlson Huang
A child who has experienced child abuse will lack self confidence and will not have the motivation to do anything. With this, they will feel useless and may have suicidal thoughts.
Edriana Murillo
Child abuse shouldn't exist in the first place. They are only children that are supposed to be loved by the people who take care of them. They don't deserve to be hurt or feel traumatized.
Evadne Ng
I think that child abuse is something that is horrifying and traumatizing, as it can break someone physically and mentally. Child abuse can ruin someone's life and cause some trauma that will affect the child as they grow up.
Toby Que
Child abuse is a very detrimental deed usually overlooked by the victims, as they are constantly convinced by their perpetrators that the perpetrators are just doing the best for them. This must be dealt with, as it's very harmful to the child's development.
Nehro Ranay
Abuse comes in many different ways. From verbal to physical abuse, these can be seen everywhere and no one is safe from it. Just because a person doesn't talk about it, doesn't mean they isn't experiencing it, so we should always be caring towards one another.
Adriel Teng
Abuse can ruin one's life because their self-esteem will be low, and they won't want to do anything because they think they'll just get hurt. Abuse is not good because it causes people to feel unwanted and uncared for, and they could end up becoming depressed.
Harold Tilos
Abuse can ruin one's life because their self-esteem will be low, and they won't want to do anything because they think they'll just get hurt. Abuse is not good because it causes people to feel unwanted and uncared for, and they could end up becoming depressed.
Chloe Uy
Child abuse is something we should have a solution for. We shouldn't just stand there and think, "Oh, I think he's being beaten up," and do nothing about it.
Stand up against child abuse; stand up for what is right
Timothy Uy
If animals do not deserve to be hurt, neither do humans, much less, little kids.
In my opinion, children should never be able to be afraid to speak out about their problem.
Ritchel Wong
I think it's unreasonable to hurt people, especially your own child. I believe that nobody deserves to be abused by anyone, no matter who they are.
Vincent Yap
Abuse can happen to anyone, at any given time and place. Victims of abuse must not be afraid to speak up and ask for help from anybody, because this is their right. An abuse victim will be affected mentally, physically, psychologically, or all three. No one deserves to be abused.
Nehro Galupe, is this child's name
Abused by a father who has no shame
His mother that passed, a story not told
This is a family whose story will unfold
- I wish I can tell you their names
Nehro Galupe here, and I'm about to share some of my experiences and thoughts.
Since I am just starting this, please allow me to introduce myself (and my family) properly.
My name is Nehro Galupe, and I study in PACE Academy. I started this blog because I have a lot of personal experiences and feelings to share (an online diary, if you will).
My dad, well, he's not the best, but I have one. Drunkard. I'm not sure if it's innate or I'm brainwashed, but I'd stay with my abusive father rather than live on the streets (but my classmates think otherwise). My mom left this world, let's say, about 5 years ago. She was pregnant with my sister at the time. I think she was just scared and didn't want my sister to experience the same thing mom and I experience. I totally understand her. Who I don't understand is dad, but what can I do?
Since I'm completely dependent, this blog is a secret - a digital hideout. I don't plan on telling dad since, this fact is a little obvious, I'll be talking about his abusive qualities quite a bit.
Speaking of which, I hear him now. I'll be updating this blog when I can.
Thanks
N.C Galupe
Everyday I wake up feeling afraid
Of my father ending the life that he’s made.
But every night I go to bed
Wondering if I should really get some help and lose him instead.
- I don't know what to do
Everyday I think my situation seems to get better, even if I still am quite scared.
Actually, I'm not sure if it's getting better or if I'm just getting numb to the feeling. I hope it's getting better though.
Imagine waking up and being afraid if your father put broken glass in your scrambled eggs. Actually, that's a pretty weak move for dad. Normally, he just waits outside my door and beats me up as soon as I leave the room. Y'know, since I'm "just a child who wastes time and money" by sleeping in a poorly ventilated room with dusty bedsheets and broken windows.
My classmates talked about their plans for Christmas break today. Needless to say, I was jealous of them. I wanted a normal Christmas. Too bad dad’s going to be busy drinking.
They also noticed the mark on my face. I didn't know what to tell them. You don't hear someone say, "oh yeah, this? Well it's cause dad threw a chair on me," every day, don't you? What would they think of dad if they heard me say that? I don't want them to think badly about him.
I'm just so confused. I want to stop getting hurt, but I really don't want to get him caught.
The only thing worse than waking up afraid, is going to sleep confused and helpless.
Thanks for spending your time reading this, it means a lot to me.
N.C Galupe
I get abused day by day
But to keep a roof on my head, there is no other way
So in this diary, I write a poem,
This house I live in is not a home.
- I just want to be cared for
I got abused again today. But I don't think there are any surprises here.
Who knew a hundred hits with a leather belt from a drunkard father would hurt this much. If I were a normal child with normal parents, I certainly would have never known.
I get new scars and new bruises. Other children get new cars and a trip to DisneyWorld.
Guys, I think this might just be the shortest entry. Everything's hurting now.
Thanks for reading another one, I really appreciate someone thinking of how I feel and makes it a hobby to read a post of mine.
N.C Galupe
Love is slowly fading away.
Even with, all my might, I try to make it stay.
I will never reach a level of normalcy
With these nightmares happening constantly
- I wish I could be less of a failure
Love is disappearing bit by bit.
Okay, I'm slowly finally realising that I was just brainwashed to think I still love my dad since, y'know, he's my dad. It's supposed to be innate to love him. It's my birthday in a bit, I think dad will forget about it though. I mean, I think he even forgot that I was his son and not his punching bag.
One of my classmates celebrated their birthday recently. My gosh, I wish I could be like them. Unfortunately, dad won't cooperate as well as my classmates'.
Mom's death anniversary is nearing too, which doesn't make anything better. If anything, it makes things worse.
If I mom didn't have me, maybe she'd have married a man who would give her French wine instead of dad who buys the cheapest beer to keep himself satisfied. Maybe mom would have lived in a pretty artisan town with the best security instead of this sad studio apartment dad and I live in right now. Mom would've had the 2 beautiful children she told me she dreamed of instead of a failure like me.
Yeah, this isn't really the best thing to think of when it's almost your birthday, but what can I do at this point? Everything's just doing downhill the longer I live.
I'm going to go try to forget this, so I'll be ending this now.
Thanks for reading my babbling once again.
N.C Galupe
Gifts I received, and wanted to receive
Cakes and happiness, I will not be deceived
Abuse chooses no holiday
Perhaps change will never come my way
- When will it stop?
Good morning, but in my case, bad morning.
It was my birthday yesterday, and I woke up prepared to be beaten up. Surprisingly, there was none of it. Or so I thought.
When I went out the room, fists didn’t meet my face. Instead, my abuser was there holding up a cake. It was nice, and the icing looked fluffy.
He said, "Happy birthday!"
We went to the table, and he prepared me food. It was suspicious, to say the least. I took a knife and tried to cut the cake. It was cardboard.
He saw my face change and laughed, "Eat it!" He shoved the cardboard into my mouth. The icing was spoiled milk, and it hurt my jaw. He laughed and laughed, but soon he found it boring. I ran to the trash as soon as he left, and spit out the cardboard. Tears slowly coming out, I wanted to cry.
It was horrible. He was drinking again too. Fun.
He was back in the living room, sipping on beer and watching tv. I tried to quietly go to my room, but I failed. Loud footsteps marching, angry eyes glaring, fists at his side balling. In that moment all I knew was that I was screwed.
So to sum it all up, my birthday was horrible. I also celebrated it by being beaten up by my abuser. Nothing new.
Thanks for reading another entry. "Happy birthday" to me, I guess.
N.C Galupe
A child abused and unloved,
With his future that doesn't seem bright.
My rights, neglected and ignored
All I could do is write
- But how can this help me?
Are children supposed to be treated like this? Whenever I look around I see children laughing and enjoying time with their parents.
Why can’t my dad be like them? Why do I get bruises instead of kind words?
Today my class went on a trip. Seeing my classmates bond and have fun with their parents, made me happy, for them. While I'm here without a parent, with no one, and I wish that I could just turn invisible.
I want to cry out for help, but I couldn't. If did, I would be homeless.
That’s not all. Once I got home, dad beat me for forgetting to turn off the lights in my room. He slapped and kicked me. I could smell a faint fragrance of alcohol, but I wasn't really sure.
I should end this entry before I accidentally fall asleep and leave this open.
No one would probably read this, but to anyone who actually will, thank you for reading and being with me when no one is.
N.C. Galupe
Leaving isn't a choice
Cause all I could hear is his voice
Memories that are broken
Are loud enough that they can be spoken
- But dad can't hear them
Love is something that should be given to every person, yet why couldn't my father give it to me?
My father used to love me like I was a shining diamond. Now, treats me as if I'm his rag doll that he could just throw around.
Today, I saw one of my classmates and their father laughing while opening what seems to be a present. I wondered why I couldn't take my eyes off them but then I realized, I have never even once received a gift from my father. I wonder how it would feel if I receive a gift that was thought about and hand-picked just for me.
It seems like I'm day dreaming a lot these days, hoping for something that really wouldn't come true.
I should stop dreaming right now, for I hear my father calling me and telling me to get some more alcohol for him. He really should stop before his liver gives up.
Thank you for reading this. I really hope I could get out before bleed to death in this place.
N.C. Galupe
Under a sober state of mind, I must say
Don't let my anger play,
As it has a mind of it's own
And will fight 'till it gets the throne
- I didn't want to hurt people like dad
Until recently, I didn't know what I was doing.
I didn't see how my past suddenly caught up to me.
What happened to "I won't let anyone feel the pain that I went through?" I feel like I failed myself, once as a child and now as an adult.
I didn't even know how it all started. One second, I was laughing with my child as we watched the late night re-runs of her favourite cartoons. The next thing I knew I was shouting at her for spilling her food all over the carpet. I didn’t know how my palm came in contact with her skin but I knew it did as I saw fear through her eyes.
How can I stop before it's too late?
How can I have my child trust me again?
N. C. Galupe
Pretending we are picture perfect,
A "happy" family hiding a secret
I have realized my faults and mistakes
I want to stop, as my sanity is at stake
- Please help me
People have always said sharing will help you feel better.
In the days of my youth, I have been hurt, outcasted, and ignored. Instead of playing with my "friends," I was in my house cleaning up the mess my abuser made. I have grown to become independent, or so I say.
As I was growing up, the beatings became worse. I can no longer see the beauty in this world, for all the light has been overcome by shadows. I could feel myself going in a downwards spiral, and slowly losing my sanity.
The girl I met years ago, who is now my wife, looks at me with those eyes. She's afraid of me. I had caused this, and I must admit it. The anger I cannot control has slowly destroyed my life. It has made me a monster, like the abuser I once vowed to never become.
The pain I felt, when I was but a small child, I have given to someone else. I have pained someone who only wanted to love me for all my broken pieces. I couldn't fathom that. She doesn't have to put up with my beatings and words. But she was scared.
She was afraid of me. The one who vowed to protect her on the altar is the one who hurting her. I should’ve stopped when she said "no". I should've stopped when she first screamed in pain, and pushed me back. I was angry.
Anger is no excuse. It is not a reason you can say when you hurt someone. Anger shouldn't blind you, and make you talk harshly with your words and fists.
One night, it dawned on me that I was becoming a monster. I was becoming the monster that haunted my dreams when I fell asleep.
I can no longer say thank you, for a monster cannot possibly be grateful.
N.C Galupe
Every story has a villain, an antagonist
An evil face, here I will reveal
Soon I hope all my wounds will heal
Read the starts and you will get the gist
- The antagonist is in front of you
Everyone judges people's outward appearances.
This is something I learned the hard way, and that is my secret. My abuser, who I will reveal right here, is someone I once loved. I hope sharing this will make me heal.
I have heard of stories of people getting abused since I was a child. Albeit some were sexually abused, it was horrifying nonetheless. My childhood was pretty traumatic and painful, and till this day I remember my past. My scars and burns I once hoped wouldn't last.
I had convinced myself that I was never gonna be "normal", no matter what normal may be. I have grown, and I have learned. I now know how this cruel world works, and I now realize there may never be a change.
Met a girl, whom I loved, and became my wife. My fists I could not stop when I was angry, and my words, I cannot take back when I calmed down. The happy marriage I had dreamed of, existed no more, and I was left to realize this was my fault. I had grown, but I have changed. Things that horrified me, now I start to do.
Blessed with a child, but my wife had ran away. Leaving a note that said, "I don’t want to stay in this toxic place anymore. I cannot deal with your fists and words, so I have left."
A child I took care of, a child I used to vent my anger. My wife leaving had broken me, and I resorted to drinking. Bottle by bottle, I felt my sanity lessening. I had woken up, and found my child on the floor, bruised and bleeding.
I was horrified, but I could not stop. I had become an abuser, to be blunt.
I had become the monster, the evil villain. Influenced by the father, whom I cannot forgive. If only I could turn back the time, and stop me from doing so.
I will stop posting from here on out. I need to reflect on myself as a father and a husband.
N.C Galupe